(intro)                                               
I read the news today, oh boy, about a lucky man who made the grade
 
And thought the news were rather sad, well I just had to laugh      
[E?]
I saw the photograph      

He blew his mind out in a car, he didn't notice that the lights had
 changed 
A crowd of people stood and stared, they'd seen his face before
Nobody was really sure if [E?]he was from the House of Lords

I saw a film today, oh boy, the england army had just won the war 
A crowd of people turned away, but I just had to look
Having [E?]read the book
I'd love to turn .... you .... [G?]on .... 

Wake up, fell out of bed, dragged a combed across my head
Found my way downstairs and dranked a cup, and looking up I noticed I w
as late
Grabbed my coat, and grabbed my hat, made the bus in seconds flat
Found my way upstairs and had a smoke, and somebody spoke and I went in
to a dream

Ahhhhh...                                       Ahhhhh...                       

I read the news today, oh boy, four thousand holes in Blackburn Lac
anshire 
And though the holes were rather small, they had to count them all
Now they know how many holes it [E?]takes to fill the Albert Hall
I'd love to turn .... you .... [G?]on ....